Mommy Does
It's no secret that I love grunge. I also love clean's, confusing? Anyhow moving right along. I have a few sites I visit on a regular basis. I hit today to see what's new and boy did they have a gem!! Tons - and I literally mean TONS - of high resolution, tileable grunge patters. I'm trying some out as we speak (type?) and they are simply wonderful. Thanks psdtuts - you've done it again! I'm posting some pictures of the patterns of tiled from various packs so you can see the seamless results. If you use photoshop (any version including elements), these will work. They also make great digital scrapbook pages. To visit the linked page click here. Click the patterns to go directly to the download for that pattern pack.

Mommy Does

I don't know if any of you have read this before, but if you have, read it again because it's effin hilarious.

Here's a prime example of "Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus" offered by an English professor from the University of Colorado for an actual class assignment:

The professor told his class one day: "Today we will experiment with a new
form called the tandem story. The process is simple. Each person will pair
off with the person sitting to his or her immediate right.

As homework tonight, one of you will write the first paragraph of a short
story. You will e-mail your partner that paragraph and send another copy to
me. The partner will read the first paragraph and then add another paragraph
to the story and send it back, also sending another copy to me. The first
person will then add a third paragraph, and so on back-and-forth.

Remember to re-read what has been written each time in order to keep the
story coherent. There is to be absolutely NO talking outside of the e-mails
and anything you wish to say must be written in the e-mail. The story is
over when both agree a conclusion has been reached."

The following was actually turned in by two of his English students:
Rebecca and Bill

(first paragraph by Rebecca)

At first, Laurie couldn't decide which kind of tea she wanted. The
chamomile, which used to be her favorite for lazy evenings at home, now
reminded her too much of Carl, who once said, in happier times, that he
liked chamomile. But she felt she must now, at all costs, keep her mind off
Carl. His possessiveness was suffocating, and if she thought about him too
much her asthma started acting up again. So chamomile was out of the

(second paragraph by Bill )

Meanwhile, Advance Sergeant Carl Harris, leader of the attack squadron now
in orbit over Skylon 4, had more important things to think about than the
neuroses of an air-headed asthmatic bimbo named Laurie with whom he had
spent one sweaty night over a year ago. "A.S. Harris to Geostation 17," he
said into his transgalactic communicator. " Polar orbit established. No sign
of resistance so far..." But before he could sign off a bluish particle beam
flashed out of nowhere and blasted a hole through his ship's cargo bay. The
jolt from the direct hit sent him flying out of his seat and across the

He bumped his head and died almost immediately, but not before he felt one
last pang of regret for psychologically brutalizing the one woman who had ever
had feelings for him. Soon afterwards, Earth stopped its pointless
hostilities towards the peaceful farmers of Skylon 4. "Congress Passes Law
Permanently Abolishing War and Space Travel," Laurie read in her newspaper
one morning. The news simultaneously excited her and bored her. She stared
out the window, dreaming of her youth, when the days had passed unhurriedly
and carefree, with no newspaper to read, no television to distract her from
her sense of innocent wonder at all the beautiful things around her. "Why
must one lose one's innocence to become a woman?" she pondered wistfully.

( Bill )

Little did she know, but she had less than 10 seconds to live. Thousands of
miles above the city, the Anu'udrian mothership launched the first of its
lithium fusion missiles. The dimwitted wimpy peaceniks who pushed the
Unilateral Aerospace disarmament Treaty through the congress had left Earth
a defenseless target for the hostile alien empires who were determined to
destroy the human race. Within two hours after the passage of the treaty the
Anu'udrian ships were on course for Earth, carrying enough firepower to
pulverize the entire planet. With no one to stop them, they swiftly
initiated their diabolical plan. The lithium fusion missile entered the
atmosphere unimpeded. The President, in his top-secret mobile submarine
headquarters on the ocean floor off the coast of Guam , felt the
inconceivably massive explosion, which vaporized poor, stupid Laurie.


This is absurd. I refuse to continue this mockery of literature. My writing
partner is a violent, chauvinistic semi-literate adolescent.

( Bill )

Yeah? Well, my writing partner is a self-centered tedious neurotic whose
attempts at writing are the literary equivalent of Valium. " Oh, shall I
have chamomile tea? Or shall I have some other sort of F--KING TEA??? Oh no,
what am I to do? I'm such an air headed bimbo who reads too many Danielle
Steele novels!"



( Bill )




( Bill )

In your dreams, Ho. Go drink some tea.


A+ - I really liked this one.
Mommy Does
So I have an ENTIRE bin of scrapbook goodies precariously balanced in my closet. So sad but so true. I've tried smilebox from Hallmark, but I hate that I have to pay to have the service or even the pages I created (they all went away when I stopped paying for the service!). So I was pleasantly surprised to find Jeanallepaige when randomly wandering through blogs. Check out her digital scrapbook gems...including freebies!!

I just downloaded this set for free - I love the colors and can't wait to buy the matching papers. Seriously what could be easier in a digital age than scrapbooking on the computer and with these kinds of assets you can't say no anymore. Thanks so much for the wonderful designs!

Be sure to visit Life As I Know It to see more collections Here
Mommy Does

So I am and always will be completely doofy, goofy and random. I love the element of random. I mean it needs to at least loosely tie to something, but there is something completely thrilling about random that just hits the chord of hilarious. So this is my sweet husband and I, but there is no explanation...nor will there ever be for that matter.
Mommy Does
I thought I might kick this off with a little humor. My son is five and has discovered, well, what makes him a boy. He loves to walk around the house and let everyone within earshot know just what it is that makes him different.

So here I will split into two stories. Both are equally hilarious and both involve my sons newfound obsession with his....boyhood.

A bit ago I was in the kitchen doing something completely unheard of and actually putting dishes away when my curious boy shouts to me to come and see his newest Transformers creation. Innoncent mind and curious heart I wander to the next room to see his latest and greatest built from bulky duplo blocks. He usually has to explain his ingenious schematics since my feeble parent mind can't quite see his vision correctly. So I follow him around on his anatomy lesson for Optimus Prime. When we reach the blue blocks protuding straight off the front he proclaims quite proudly, "and this is Optimus Prime's penis! It's just like mine mom!" Oh boy...

To continue this saga we enter Target on a totally benign mission to obtain prices on sheet sets for my sons youngest brothers new bed. Little did I know what lie in wait for me...We wander down aisles with no one in sight save the ocassional person who was usually leaving the other end. Finally I stop to look at a price tag and my son charges up to an assosciate and announces, "I'm a big boy and big boy's have a penis. Mine is a big penis!" She laughed and told me she had a son who was also fanatical about his new favorite part. Face that matches the rose red towels I hurriedly herd him and sister away while begging God to open the ground and swallow me up.

So gals when you ask when does it begin I answer you with....way too early and way too loudly!

I will post a picture of his creation when I get a chance *winks*. This blog is for you ConstantlyUndone.